


Poems are underated, that’s why they’re created

by Gaygent8



Series: Birthday works [1]
Category: Splatoon
Genre: Birthday, Birthday Party, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Light Angst, Love Poems, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-15
Updated: 2019-07-15
Packaged: 2020-06-28 15:20:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19815025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gaygent8/pseuds/Gaygent8
Summary: My Agent Three turned 18 on January 6th and I’m a lazy ass and forgotAlso for my birthday on the 16th of July





	Poems are underated, that’s why they’re created

Oooooooooooouh! Eight is really excited! Why you may ask? Well, she doesn’t really know, but apparently it’s Three’s ‘birthday’. They didn’t have that back in the Underground, so she doesn’t know what it is. It’s some sort of celebration of your birth?

On that day, you reunite with your family and friends, give gifts, party and eat cake. Pretty basic as a holiday.

Three is a very good person, minus the brainwashing. She is very much better than Eight. Eight is horrible. She is bad. Three is so good, Eight is very different.

Even though Eight is bad, Three still likes Eight. How?

Three is good at everything. Fighting, eating, cooking, comforting, cuddling and the list could go on.

Moral of the speech: Eight is horrible and Three is better than her. Eight doesn’t deserve Three. Three is not lucky to have Eight. Neither does Four.

Eight built machines against her friends. Programmed to hurt, torture and kill them.

Regret

Regret

Sadness

Sadness

Guilt

Guilt

Why does Eight have to deal with that????

Why  
Why  
Why  
Why  
Why  
Whywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhy

Why..?

  
***

  
Wow, it’s been 4 months since they started to be friends, her and Three!

4 months since Three helped Four deal with personal problems.

4 months since Four helped Three deal with personal problems.

4 months since Three went on a mission.

4 months since Eight came back from a mission.

3 months and three weeks since Eight is friend with Four.

2 months since all the Agents moved in with each other.

1 month since Four started to get jealous of Eight.

1 month since Four regretted being jealous of Eight.

1 month since Four yelled at Three for the first time.

3 weeks since Four and Three made up.

2 weeks since Off The Hook got married.

1 week since Marie asked Four out.

5 days since Four’s first date.

4 days since Four and Marie’s first kiss.

3 days since Eight visited for the first time Four’s room (that is right next to hers)  
  
2 days since Eight and Four burnt pancakes.  
  
1 day since Eight learned what was a birthday and freaked out on what outfit to wear and what gift to buy.

1 minute since Four did the same thing as Eight yesterday.

  
Wow, what an eventful 4 months!

  
(Minus the dumb events that one one cares for)

  
***

  
Wow, it’s been 18 years since Three is alive.

  
Yay me I guess.

  
She is now legally allowed to buy cough suppressants. HAH bet you didn’t know it was illegal before that age. Also, there is a law somewhere where you can’t honk at a sandwich shop AFTER 9 pm. Here you go, more knowledge.

And SUCK IT cause she rented an apartment before 18 so she was technically doing something illegal. Oops I guess.

Know, what to wear.

  
Leather jacket, jeans, black tank top and her trusty skull bandana screamed in her head.

Yeah whatever it’s not like she has any impulse control anyway.

Let me say that that outfit is edgy as fuck.

  
***

  
Yeah the party is literally downstairs but what if she trips and falls and everyone see-

  
“UGH!!” Eight gagged.  
“Focus, Eight! Wanna leave a good impression to her parents?” Eight nodded. “Behave then!” Four hissed.

  
Oh Cod, her parents. Her parents aren’t nice people. Except her mother, she is very sweet. And her brother she has yet to meet.

They walk down the hall and down the stairs. There is Three’s family sat on the light blue couches.

  
Her mother, Aïka, is dressed in a very fancy purple dress, the colour of her tentacles. Fine white heels and her hair in a bun with a scrouchy tying them around to top the whole outfit off.

Her father, Alexander, is in a neat white shirt with a simple black jacket over it. Black jeans, a watch and black shoes completed the outfit. His green tentacles clash with his outfit.

Her brother, Ryan, is in a very chic white tuxedo. Orange bow to match his tentacles, he looked ready for a weeding.

  
“Are you that girl from the Underground?” Alexander asked with a powerful voice.

Eight nodded. “Oh, my sweetie! So nice to see you again! This is Ryan, Three’s brother!” He escaped a small ‘hello’ from his mouth. “And this is Alexander, her father!”

“So, you’re the one my sis is fussing over?” He asks with mockery in his voice.

“Say what?!” Three screams from her bedroom upstairs.

“Woah, ok!” He mutters.

“I get that everyday, c’mon! Man up, baby boy!” Four teases.

They laugh. Angry footsteps are heard and down comes Three.

“Geez, Three! Are you bringin’ back the emo phase?” Ryan jokes.

“I. Am. Going. To. Kill. You. Both.” Three menaces.

***

  
“Happy Birthday, Agent Three! Happy Birthday Agent Three! Happy birthday, happy birthday, Happy birthday Agent Three!” They chant.

Somehow, her father doesn’t chant.  
She doesn’t blame him.

  
“Make a wish, Agent Three!” Marina chirps.

A wish… huh..?

‘ _I wish that we can all have a very smooth and nice life from now on, and that Eight can adapt more and more. I wish for the best of luck to all of my friends, including my mother, brother and his boyfriend, and especially Eight and Four.’_

  
Three blows out the candles.

  
“That was a long wish!” Pearl scoffs.

“Shut up, Pearl. I bet it wasn’t as long as your forehead!” Three snaps back in a joke.

Everyone laughs, especially Marina and Three, but not Pearl.

“Dig in, everyone!” Marina chants.

Marina cuts pieces while Pearl serves. Three gets the ‘Happy Birthday, 3!’ piece.

  
“Hey Eight” Three says, nudging her arm on Eight’s side. “I like your outfit, it’s nice and really suits you.” Three winks, which she never does.

Eight blushes furiously and her tentacles melt a bit. “Thank you.”

  
***

  
“So, who has the honour to smash Three’s face in the cake?” Pearl announces.

“Me!” Both Four and Eight scream at the exact same time.

“Oh no.”

“Oh yes!”

  
Splat

  
Now Three’s face and clothes are full of cake.

Everyone laughs, but her father looks at her with a smirk. ‘He is NOT going to ruin my first birthday celebration in years, no way’

  
So what she does is get a part of her cake and throws it on her so-called father.

  
He does not like that and goes is his car. For the rest of the night.

  
“Oh my! He deserved that, honey!” Her mother bursts in laughter.

  
***

After the cake, gifts were next.

  
“Ok Three, which first?” Callie asked Three.

“Um, the golden one.” She answers.

“Booyah! Good taste, Three!” Pearl shoots.

  
Inside were a manual on how to repair weapons and keychains of Off The Hook; a crown and a pair of headphones.

“Thanks Pearl, I really like it.” Three manages to suppress the joy in her.

“Think fast!” Marie screams and a gift is launched at her face.

  
‘From Callie, lots of love’

  
Inside the small box is a necklace with a small pink squid and a green squid. Squid Sisters merch, she guesses.

  
“Thank you, Callie!”

  
Another gift launched. Yellow packaging everywhere. Instinctively, she looks at Four.

Inside there is a yellow squid plushie and a pink Octo plushie.

  
“Figured you might miss us, me and Eight, one day.” Four replies.

  
A letter is written ‘open tonight, so you don’t cry in front of us. Also, I need a hug later.’

  
“Yeah, sure.”

Boom, next gift.

  
After a lot of neat packaging, a box reveals a framed picture of her and Ryan when they were young, bruises all around, but still happy nonetheless.

  
“We were so tiny and happy!” Three mumbles half to herself.

  
Marina’s gift is simple and clean; a jean jacket, OTH keychains, mugs and shirts, and a shirt that says: leave me alone, I haven’t had my coffee’.

  
“Nice one, Marina.” Three shoots.

Her mom’s gift terrified her a bit. Once she receives it, she opens it with shaking hands.

  
‘When my daughter turns 18, she shall open this letter. Not later, not sooner.’

  
‘ _Hello, dear!_

_Your mother is very proud of you. You are a beautiful daughter, skillful and smart, but also headstrong and sarcastic._

_No matter what happens, I will always love you, no matter what._

_You are always welcome in my house._

_Your mother loves you very much!_

_- <3, Aïka.’_

“Mom, when did you write that..?” Three asks.

“10 years ago, why?”

“Just asking.” Three wasn’t very stressed anymore.

Marie’s gift was next. Neat, white and green wrapper surrounding the gift. Unwrapping the paper, she reveals a giant Squid Sisters poster, plushies of Squid Sisters, shirts, pants and a pair of shoes (all of the Squid Sisters, mind you).

  
“Woah, that’s… a lot of merch…” Three was taken aback.

Final gift: Eight.

First, the card.

‘

Oooooooooooouh! Eight is really excited! Why you may ask? Well, she doesn’t really know, but apparently it’s Three’s ‘birthday’. They didn’t have that back in the Underground, so she doesn’t know what it is. It’s some sort of celebration of your birth?

On that day, you reunite with your family and friends, give gifts, party and eat cake. Pretty basic as a holiday.

Three is a very good person, minus the brainwashing. She is very much better than Eight. Eight is horrible. She is bad. Three is so good, Eight is very different.

Even though Eight is bad, Three still likes Eight. How?

Three is good at everything. Fighting, eating, cooking, comforting, cuddling and the list could go on.

Moral of the speech: Eight is horrible and Three is better than her. Eight doesn’t deserve Three. Three is not lucky to have Eight. Neither does Four.

Eight built machines against her friends. Programmed to hurt, torture and kill them.

Regret

Regret

Sadness

Sadness

Guilt

Guilt

Why does Eight have to deal with that????

Why  
Why  
Why  
Why  
Why  
Whywhywhywhywhywhywhywhywhy

Why..?

  
***

  
Wow, it’s been 4 months since they started to be friends, her and Three!

4 months since Three helped Four deal with personal problems.

4 months since Four helped Three deal with personal problems.

2 months since Three went on a mission.

2 months since Eight came back from a mission.

2 months since Eight is friend with Four.

2 months since all the Agents moved in with each other.

1 month since Four started to get jealous of Eight.

1 month since Four regretted being jealous of Eight.

1 month since Four yelled at Three for the first time.

3 weeks since Four and Three made up.

2 weeks since Off The Hook got married.

1 week since Marie asked Four out.

5 days since Four’s first date.

4 days since Four and Marie’s first kiss.

3 days since Eight visited for the first time Four’s room (that is right next to hers)  
  
2 days since Eight and Four burnt pancakes.  
  
1 day since Eight learned what was a birthday and freaked out on what outfit to wear and what gift to buy.

1 minute since Four did the same thing as Eight yesterday.

  
Wow, what an eventful 4 months!

  
(Minus the dumb events that one one cares for)

  
***

  
Wow, it’s been 18 years since Three is alive.

  
Yay me I guess.

  
She is now legally allowed to buy cough suppressants. HAH bet you didn’t know it was illegal before that age. Also, there is a law somewhere where you can’t honk at a sandwich shop AFTER 9 pm. Here you go, more knowledge.

And SUCK IT cause she rented an apartment before 18 so she was technically doing something illegal. Oops I guess.

Know, what to wear.

  
Leather jacket, jeans, black tank top and her trusty skull bandana screamed in her head.

Yeah whatever it’s not like she has any impulse control anyway.

Let me say that that outfit is edgy as fuck.

  
***

  
Yeah the party is literally downstairs but what if she trips and falls and everyone see-

  
“UGH!!” Eight gagged.  
“Focus, Eight! Wanna leave a good impression to her parents?” Eight nodded. “Behave then!” Four hissed.

  
Oh Cod, her parents. Her parents aren’t nice people. Except her mother, she is very sweet. And her brother she has yet to meet.

They walk down the hall and down the stairs. There is Three’s family sat on the light blue couches.

  
Her mother, Aïka, is dressed in a very fancy purple dress, the colour of her tentacles. Fine white heels and her hair in a bun with a scrouchy tying them around to top the whole outfit off.

Her father, Alexander, is in a neat white shirt with a simple black jacket over it. Black jeans, a watch and black shoes completed the outfit. His green tentacles clash with his outfit.

Her brother, Ryan, is in a very chic white tuxedo. Orange bow to match his tentacles, he looked ready for a weeding.

  
“Are you that girl from the Underground?” Alexander asked with a powerful voice.

Eight nodded. “Oh, my sweetie! So nice to see you again! This is Ryan, Three’s brother!” He escaped a small ‘hello’ from his mouth. “And this is Alexander, her father!”

“So, you’re the one my sis is fussing over?” He asks with mockery in his voice.

“Say what?!” Three screams from her bedroom upstairs.

“Woah, ok!” He mutters.

“I get that everyday, c’mon! Man up, baby boy!” Four teases.

They laugh. Angry footsteps are heard and down comes Three.

“Geez, Three! Are you bringin’ back the emo phase?” Ryan jokes.

“I. Am. Going. To. Kill. You. Both.” Three menaces.

***

  
“Happy Birthday, Agent Three! Happy Birthday Agent Three! Happy birthday, happy birthday, Happy birthday Agent Three!” They chant.

Somehow, her father doesn’t chant.  
She doesn’t blame him.

  
“Make a wish, Agent Three!” Marina chirps.

A wish… huh..?

‘I wish that we can all have a very smooth and nice life from now on, and that Eight can adapt more and more. I wish for the best of luck to all of my friends, including my mother, brother and his boyfriend, and especially Eight and Four.’

  
Three blows out the candles.

  
“That was a long wish!” Pearl scoffs.

“Shut up, Pearl. I bet it wasn’t as long as your forehead!” Three snaps back in a joke.

Everyone laughs, especially Marina and Three, but not Pearl.

“Dig in, everyone!” Marina chants.

Marina cuts pieces while Pearl serves. Three gets the ‘Happy Birthday, 3!’ piece.

  
“Hey Eight” Three says, nudging her arm on Eight’s side. “I like your outfit, it’s nice and really suits you.” Three winks, which she never does.

Eight blushes furiously and her tentacles melt a bit. “Thank you.”

  
***

  
“So, who has the honour to smash Three’s face in the cake?” Pearl announces.

“Me!” Both Four and Eight scream at the exact same time.

“Oh no.”

“Oh yes!”

  
Splat

  
Now Three’s face and clothes are full of cake.

Everyone laughs, but her father looks at her with a smirk. ‘He is NOT going to ruin my first birthday celebration in years, no way’

  
So what she does is get a part of her cake and throws it on her so-called father.

  
He does not like that and goes is his car. For the rest of the night.

  
“Oh my! He deserved that, honey!” Her mother bursts in laughter.

  
***

After the cake, gifts were next.

  
“Ok Three, which first?” Callie asked Three.

“Um, the golden one.” She answers.

“Booyah! Good taste, Three!” Pearl shoots.

  
Inside were a manual on how to repair weapons and keychains of Off The Hook; a crown and a pair of headphones.

“Thanks Pearl, I really like it.” Three manages to suppress the joy in her.

“Think fast!” Marie screams and a gift is launched at her face.

  
‘From Callie, lots of love’

  
Inside the small box is a necklace with a small pink squid and a green squid. Squid Sisters merch, she guesses.

  
“Thank you, Callie!”

  
Another gift launched. Yellow packaging everywhere. Instinctively, she looks at Four.

Inside there is a yellow squid plushie and a pink Octo plushie.

  
“Figured you might miss us, me and Eight, one day.” Four replies.

  
A letter is written ‘open tonight, so you don’t cry in front of us. Also, I need a hug later.’

  
“Yeah, sure.”

Boom, next gift.

  
After a lot of neat packaging, a box reveals a framed picture of her and Ryan when they were young, bruises all around, but still happy nonetheless.

  
“We were so tiny and happy!” Three mumbles half to herself.

  
Marina’s gift is simple and clean; a jean jacket, OTH keychains, mugs and shirts, and a shirt that says: leave me alone, I haven’t had my coffee’.

  
“Nice one, Marina.” Three shoots.

Her mom’s gift terrified her a bit. Once she receives it, she opens it with shaking hands.

  
‘When my daughter turns 18, she shall open this letter. Not later, not sooner.’

  
‘Hello, dear!

Your mother is very proud of you. You are a beautiful daughter, skillful and smart, but also headstrong and sarcastic.

No matter what happens, I will always love you, no matter what.

You are always welcome in my house.

Your mother loves you very much!

-<3, Aïka.’

“Mom, when did you write that..?” Three asks.

“10 years ago, why?”

“Just asking.” Three wasn’t very stressed anymore.

Marie’s gift was next. Neat, white and green wrapper surrounding the gift. Unwrapping the paper, she reveals a giant Squid Sisters poster, plushies of Squid Sisters, shirts, pants and a pair of shoes (all of the Squid Sisters, mind you).

  
“Woah, that’s… a lot of merch…” Three was taken aback.

Final gift: Eight.

First, the card.

_‘Hi, Three!_

_I asked Marina and Pearl how to write a letter, so I’m sorry if it isn’t that good. You can read this out loud too!_

  
_With her scars and stare_

_She is mine I declare_

_That person is Three_

_I smile with glee_

_Knowing we’re friends_

_I just come to dead ends_

_When I think of her_

_Even though my past is a blur_

_I know I can rhyme_

_I’m never running out of time_

_Not when I’m with Three_

_I can guarantee_

_My past doesn’t matter anymore_

_I don’t search the core_

_Of my nightmares and PTSD_

_But I know that Three_

_Is always there to save me_

_I know she has the key_

_To my heart she knows_

_She can get off my clothes_

_And by clothes I mean fears_

_She’d only be ears_

_To my traumatic story_

_I would tell her with glory_

_She isn’t scared of anything_

_She truly is the king_

_Of her own castle_

_To her I’m not a hassle_

_To that I’m so grateful_

_That she is so faithful_

_She accepted me and loved me_

_Not even wanting to agree_

_But now she’s stuck with me_

_Even though to some degree_

_She really does like my company_

_And she really can’t deny that without glee!_

_I really do love her_

_There is no denying that_

_Even an amateur_

_Or a little brat_

_Can see clearly through this_

_She can’t keep it a secret_

_I would just have to kiss_

_You know it’s not top secret_

_You love me more than you think_

_Even though you won’t admit_

_We really do click_

_Maybe you just don’t wanna commit_

_That is up to yourself_

_But I will keep waiting, prince charming_

_Because I cannot do it myself_

_I hope this is disarming_

_Disarming your self doubt and fears_

_To tell me how you feel_

_Through cheers and tears_

_You and I will heal_

_Together we shall help eachother_

_Through ice and fire_

_Even if I’m carefree_

_I really do love you, Three_

  
_That’s all I have! I truly meant everything in here_

_(This is really bad, I’m so sorry!)_

  
_Happy Birthday Three!_

_-MachoOcho’_

_Three started crying in the middle of the poem._

_There was no denying that she was touched._

**Author's Note:**

> I sacrificed my sleep for this
> 
> At least it’s worth it for my bd
> 
> Happy birth to me :)


End file.
